“It is when surrender of our lives to God is made, and not until then, that the song begins in our hearts. Only in entire surrender and devotion to Christ can we learn to sing the new song. We must abandon ourselves altogether to Christ. Many of us serve Christ so daintily, so delicately, with so much self-reserve and withholding of ourselves from sacrifice, that we never learn the reality of the joy of Christ. When we devote ourselves to Him wholly, the song will begin!”  ~J.R. Miller 1905

Our new son, known as “Marcus” for now. This is the only picture we are allowed to share right now, but stay tuned.

God is, once again, inviting us to experience an even deeper relationship with Him. To watch Him work ever new miracles in our family. To soar to higher places in His arms.

He has another little one on his way to our home, and very soon — within the next few weeks. We aren’t at liberty to share much about this new son because of his current situation, but we want you to know him, so we will share as much as we are allowed.

He was born in Africa to a very young birth mom and lived a difficult and bleak life for his first few years. When he was four years old, he was adopted by a family in the U.S. As with Braedan and Ian, his adoptive family is seeking a new home for him now. We won’t go into any detail about this, but we will say that he is now six years old, needs to come home very fast, and that our family is beseeching you to pray for us. He is coming to us with a long list of very challenging behaviors and with a heart that will struggle long and hard to trust us and believe that we are committed to parenting him for the rest of his life. The agency handling this adoption is calling him “Marcus”, so that is the name we will use in our blog posts for now.

Scott and I have prayed for several weeks about this little boy, and as a family we have prayed intensely for the past week since we spoke with his family and got a more complete picture of his story. Our only prayer has been that God would make clear to us what He wanted us to do.

We know that not every child out there needing a home is a Rosenow. And we know that God alone knows for sure how many are ours and which ones those are. We know that this is likely to be a long, tough journey for our whole family, requiring hard work, sacrifice, and more dying-to-self for each of us.  And we know that the amount of difficulty involved never confirms nor refutes a calling. So the only real question has been whether or not God was calling us to pursue this child’s adoption. We believe we have the answer to this question now.

Most of our children were ready to move forward almost immediately, and the few who weren’t so sure, came to us within a couple of days to say that they had prayed and were ready to move forward. Scott and I were still praying for clear leading about this and asked them to express their reasons for feeling like this child belonged in our home. Their answers all centered around their belief that our home is a place of healing as they related their own memories of healing after they came home, and expressed their readiness to be a part of helping “Marcus” become whole as a Rosenow. They are excited and prepared for the weeks and months we probably have ahead of us. These children God has brought to us humble and inspire us daily.

So we are working feverishly to raise the money needed and to get his paperwork finished. Unfortunately, we can’t even start the process until we come up with the $3500 agency fee and the money needed for our home study. We are waiting for them to tell us the exact amount needed for the home study, but we are expecting it to be about $1500.

Right after we get things started, we will need $2000 for our attorney’s fee, and then we will need money for plane tickets and other travel expenses for the required three to ten days in his state to wrap up the process and bring him home.

Additionally, we have to have another triple bunk bed, a car seat, and clothes, etc. before we can travel for him, and these things all need to happen as soon as possible. We are hoping to complete everything and travel in about six weeks.

As with any TSC child, The Shepherd’s Crook has set up an account for “Marcus” so that tax-deductible donations can be made to help with any of the above needs. If you are able and interested in helping us bring our son home, you can either:

donate online here

or

mail a check to
The Shepherd’s Crook Orphan Ministry
P.O. Box 773
West Chester, OH 45071

Either way, be sure you designate that the donation is for “Marcus Rosenow” 

And most of all, we ask that you please pray for “Marcus” and for us. Specifically, we are asking God for wisdom and courage and deep love for this little one who will need so much from us; and we are asking for supernatural healing of this new son’s heart. He’s already had so much grief and sadness, upheaval and transition in his short life, but God is fully able to heal him. We believe this with all our hearts.

We truly long to “abandon ourselves altogether to Christ”and “devote ourselves to Him wholly” so that we can “learn to sing the new song.” Won’t you consider joining us? ((UPDATE POSTED ON 5/3/15))

“God can take the broken fragments of a life, shattered by sorrow or by sin, and out of them make a new life whose music shall thrill many hearts. If one is discouraged, if the life seems to be hopelessly broken, the gospel of divine love brings encouragement. There are no ruins of life out of which God cannot build beauty and blessing! ~ J. R. Miller 1905

So sorry to have left everyone hanging after our trip to Tampa. Life hit us hard when we returned, and there hasn’t been a lot of time for gathering thoughts and getting them down.

I got very sick after we returned home, and was off my feet for over a week, and subpar for a total of about three weeks. That has happened twice now since the beginning of the year and is really unusual for me. I’m really hoping that will be it for my couch-time for many years now. It doesn’t work so well with this big family.

Nathan had his leg surgery just before we left for Tampa, and we all anticipated that he would be back into his prosthesis and in full swing within four to six weeks. Unfortunately, he is now at almost ten weeks post-op and pain is still making it impossible for him to tolerate being in his prosthesis for more than a few hours each day — at best. This has been a blow to the family, and we are so thankful that Erin is now fully functional again. His surgeon and his prosthetist are working on a solution, but . . .

Meghan, who was born with some relatively mild deformities in both hands and feet, had hand surgery just last week on her right hand as we try to alleviate the pain and gradual loss of function and strength that she has been experiencing for several months. Although she isn’t off of her feet like Nathan and Erin have been, she is still “limping along” because her arm will be in a cast for four weeks.

As we’ve said before, it takes our whole team to keep things flowing smoothly here, and it’s been very hard to keep things moving along during the past few months as our older kids have undergone their own challenges. They are also feeling discouraged and anxious to be back into a more normal routine.

In addition to these unplanned surgeries, we just learned last week that Carlin has developed reflux in both ureters, which is forcing urine from her bladder back up to her kidneys. This is a dangerous situation that can result in damage to her already-compromised kidneys, so she will have to undergo surgery as soon as it can be scheduled to correct this problem. We don’t, yet, know just how involved this surgery will be or how much it will disrupt daily life here.

Scott and I were so blessed (beyond description) to have a few days away together to rest and try to reconnect with each other. Marriage is hard under the best of circumstances, and it can become so challenging after months of relentless stress. We were so thankful for this little retreat and the refueling it provided for us — as a couple, as parents to this brood, and as directors of TSC.

The cabin that provided the quiet respite Scott’s and my hearts were craving

Time hiking in the woods around Hocking Hills was incredibly therapeutic. (We took our youngest dog along to make it easier for the crew back here at home.)

Scrumptious meals for two while we were away. Wow! Cooking for only two is SO EASY!

I feel sometimes like we spend a lot of time whining in our updates to all of you, but we are tired. We were so excited about a year of rest from surgeries when Lilyan’s spine surgeon decided he needed to postpone doing operations on her back. So these almost back-to-back unplanned and unexpected illnesses and surgeries have kind of beaten us down a bit. And they have kept us from being able to get back to our church family as we had hoped we would be able to do.

We are now trying hard to just trust where God is taking us and know that He has a plan for all of the things that appear to us to be unplanned. They are not surprises to Him, although we had pictured a completely different winter and spring. We would so much appreciate your prayers as we keep trying to learn to trust God more fully.

In my quiet time this morning, I read the following quote from Octavius Winslow. It puts things so much into perspective, and I was thankful to stumble across it.

“If God were perfectly comprehensible in His being and government to a finite mind, then either He must forego His claim to divinity, or we must cease to be human. And yet in nothing, scarcely, is the Christian more at fault than in attempting to fathom those dispensations of His government in which He conceals His purposes and enshrouds Himself; and failing, questions the wisdom and rectitude of His procedure! But how gently does the result rebuke and confound our misapprehension and distrust. When from the secret place of thunder He utters His voice; when, in His dealings. darkness is under His feet; when He makes darkness His secret place, His pavilion round about Him dark waters and thick clouds of the skies — even then He is but making a way for His love to us, which shall appear all the more real and precious by the very cloud-chariot in which it travels. The believer in Christ has nothing slavishly to dread, but everything filially to hope from God. So fully is he pardoned, so completely is he justified, so perfectly is he reconciled to God, the darkest dispensations in which He hides Himself shall presently unvail the brightest views of His character and love; and thus the lowering cloud that deepened in its darkness and grew larger as it approached, shall dissolve and vanish, leaving no object visible to the eye but Him whose essence and name is Love. Oh, it is because we have such shallow views of God’s love that we have such defective views of God’s dealings. We blindly interpret the symbols of His providence, because we so imperfectly read the engraving of His heart. Faith finds it difficult to spell the word ‘Love,’ as written in the shaded characters of its discipline; to believe that the cloud which looks so sombre and threatening is the love-chariot of Him who for our ransom gave Himself unto the death, because He so loved us!” 

We so long to move past this place where “we have such shallow views of God’s love that we have such defective views of God’s dealings.” But the way to reach this deeper understanding lies directly along the paths God ordains for us. Please pray that we will not lose sight of this during our times of weariness. 

If you want to read more about these current challenges and our wrestlings with God from the perspective of our hearts, you can read my most recent blog post, “You Not the Boss! I the Boss!” on my personal blog. It is dedicated to our daughter, Meghan, and shares some of what I’ve learned through parenting her.

In closing, I want to thank all of you, again, for the ways in which you bless our family. During the holiday season, we were showered with financial blessings that made it possible for us to replenish our desperately-needy towels and sheets supply, buy new shoes for the children, repair our van, replace our fence which has been falling apart for several years now, and take this getaway for the two of us. And just this afternoon, Scott and I ran to the church to pick up the material blessings (paper products, food, grocery staples, etc.) that our church family regularly provides for our family through the program they call “Just One More.” How can we possibly communicate to everyone involved — and proclaim to a world looking in from the outside — just how much these very tangible expressions of love mean to us? We are so blessed.

Have a beautiful, blessed Easter week. We hope to see those of you in our church family this coming Sunday.

I did manage to find a little quiet, alone time this morning to work through all that I was thinking and feeling about The last twenty-four hours or so of our trip. This post, “I Want You to Know“, on my private blog is my best attempt to communicate those thoughts and feelings.

So . . . the Blackthorn 35th Memorial Service is behind us. We are still processing all that our hearts are feeling, but we wanted to share a little bit about the events now. I may share more from my heart on my personal blog, Owning My Nothingness, once I’ve worked through everything.

One of the hardest things about the past twenty-four hours has been the pain we saw and felt from the survivors, and especially from the crew’s beloved captain. In many, many ways, the survivors, out of everyone who was affected by the events of January 28, 1980, have had the hardest thirty-five years. Some wounds just don’t ever heal.

One of the most surprising things about the past twenty-four hours has been the depth of loyalty and love and “family-ness” we felt from the survivors for each other and for those of us who lost someone that night. We had never met any of these men or their wives before, but the moment we walked into the dinner last night, we felt like we’d walked right into a huge group hug. Being surrounded by so many people outside of our family who not only understood our grief and pain, but also shared it and wanted to help us carry it, was a sort of balm for areas of our souls that we hadn’t realized were still in need of healing.

Every family had a story. We wish we had been able to sit and listen to every one of them in detail. The son who turned twenty-two the day before the collision and was told in a phone conversation with his family that they would have a party for him when he got home — this is a family who had already lost one son; the seventeen-year-old who died — so young!; the brother who was engaged and planning to marry that summer; the survivor who still has medical issues because of the oil he took into his lungs while waiting to be rescued from the wreckage; the eighteen-year-old who, desperate to save some of the trapped men, refused to stop diving again and again until finally, he never resurfaced. So many stories. Endless numbers of lives changed in an instant.

WARNING: Many pictures ahead.

Pictures from the dinner last night:

Crabby Bill’s right on the water in St. Petersburg

Survivors and family members of those who perished sharing dinner.

Survivors and family members of those who perished sharing dinner.

The two of us with two of the survivors who knew Gary very well. One shared very openly that he is now a Believer because of my brother’s example and friendship.

The sister of one of the survivors who fell in love with our kids and wanted a picture with us. She works with children as they exit the U.S. foster system with no life skills, no home, no family, and a $75 gift from the government to start their lives. Heartbreaking!! This is tragically similar to children who leave their orphanages in developing countries.

This morning, we got up very early so we could make the hour-plus drive back to St. Petersburg for the ceremony. When a USCG helicopter flew low over the bay, tilted, opened the side door, and dropped a wreath into the water, this set the stage for the storm of emotions to follow over the next few hours.

Our kids looking at Gary’s name on the monument before the service began.

Gary’s listing

Where it happened. Twenty-three men’s lives ended, and twenty-five others’ lives changed drastically and permanently.

Our three littlest, looking out over the bay where an uncle they’ll never meet was ushered Home by a legion of angels.

Early on, the men who perished were honored with a fly-over by a Coast Guard plane and two CG helicopters

Our National Anthem

Amazing Grace — bagpipes – more tears

The Colorguard

Very moving twenty-one gun salute. One of the survivors gave the kids eight of the shell casings after the ceremony.

Organizations in the community still place many wreaths — one at a time — in memory of the men who died

Probably the most moving part of the ceremony for me was the roses. Twenty-three roses – one for each of the twenty-three men who died – were brought to base of the monument one at a time.

The Cutterman chosen to carry Gary’s rose when his name was read.

Carrying Gary’s rose to the monument

Placing Gary’s rose at the base before saluting and returning to his place in line

All twenty-three roses

The actual bell from the Blackthorn, recovered after the wreckage was salvaged — each time a name was read for the roses, the bell was rung

Gary’s rose – after the ceremony

Some of the survivors, their families, and family members of those who died

After the ceremony, a few went to lunch, and we had the opportunity to ask questions, exchange email and Facebook info, and have some confusing details of the accident clarified.

We ended the day with our nephew who lives in FL now. He drove over two hours to have a one-hour coffee chat with us. It was so great to see him and catch up on his life a bit.

Our nephew, Jonathan, with our babies

This sunset greeted us as we returned to our hotel where we got the kids to bed early and started packing for trip home in the morning.

The kids have been so good this whole trip. It was a tough schedule for them, and they really did smile through almost every minute of it. But they are ready to head home now. Roslyn is missing Murray, and Jaden tells us that he misses his “people.”😊 This has been an opportunity and a blessing that we will never forget.

Goodnight, and thank you so much to all of you who sent notes throughout the day telling us that you were praying for us. I’ll write more about the emotional side of this, and my thoughts, once I can find the words and the time to write them out.

**Typing this quickly between scheduled events. Please forgive any typos until I have time to go back and do a more thorough job of editing**

We had hoped to blog at the end of each day while we were here, but we underestimated just how intense our schedule here would be. It has been one of the most exhausting things we’ve ever done; and there are few times in our lives when we’ve felt so blessed. It has been too awesome even to describe spending time with TSC families we’ve never met before, connecting with other adoptive families, reconnecting with TSC families we met years ago, and seeing new hearts ignited by the thought of adoption and orphan care.

I’ll just briefly recap each day/service, etc. below and include pictures with captions.

Sunday morning we spent at Grace Church in Zephryhills. As soon as we arrived (late, of course!), we were greeted by an old high school friend we haven’t seen since our wedding in 1977 who has been living here in FL for years now; and by friends from MD we haven’t seen since about 1980. We knew our high school friend and her husband were coming, but the other couple completely surprised us. It was such a joy to see all of them.

The small congregation at Grace made us feel so welcome and loved, and we enjoyed lunch afterward with the Clantons — a family with several adopted children, one of whom is a TSC child. Here are some pictures from that morning.

Scott’s intro

My portion of our presentation

Scott singing with Jaden and Lilyan

Our friends and long-time TSC supporters the Konyas — from our newlywed days in MD — surprised us by showing up Sunday morning

Our high school friend Rhonda and her husband Paul. Last saw her at our wedding in 1977

Our kids had the honor of meeting Selah — one of the Clanton’s adopted daughters from Ukraine. Our family has prayed much for little Selah since her accident a few years ago. She is precious.

Jaden and the Clanton’s TSC son Shadrach totally hit it off.

After lunch, we dashed back to the hotel for a quick little freshen-up session, then dashed to Crestview Baptist here in Lakeland. We arrived late again (there’s a theme here), and were met by a crew of people anxious to help us get set up and ready to start on time. What a beautiful evening we had. After the service and a little Q&A at our TSC table in the lobby, the pastor and his wife (adoptive parents themselves) took us out for a late dinner. The kids have handled all of this amazingly well. Roslyn, our child most likely to become stressed in situations like this, did start to melt down a bit by the end of the evening and was a puddle of tears by the time we got them in bed at 11:00 that night. Thankfully, she returned to her perky little self after a good night’s sleep. Pictures of our time with the Crestview crew:

Time to sing again

Love this shot of Jaden 🙂

Incredible experience seeing Faith again – TSC daughter of Jim and Angie McGrath. We met her once right after she came home. Now she’s a beautiful, poised, amazing teenage girl.

Jim McGrath entertaining the kids while we waited for our table for dinner

Faith and her sister Hope (also adopted from China) were awesome babysitters for us throughout the evening. You can see the stress in little Roslyn’s face here.

My sweet friend and TSC mom, Angie. Was so good to see her again.

With Angie and her husband, Jim — parents to Faith and Hope

Dinner and good conversation at Cracker Barrel Sunday night

On Monday, we met our high school friend Rhonda and her daughter for an early lunch. They drove two hours for our talk on Sunday morning, drove two hours home, and then drove two hours back over here again on Monday so we could have lunch together. Amazing!

Lunch on Monday with Rhonda and her daughter, Kim

After lunch, the kids had time for a bit of a nap before we went to the beautiful home of Garry and Jan Seitz, nestled at the end of a quiet street and almost surrounded by a lake bordered by huge trees dripping with Spanish moss. It was breathtaking and just looking at the scene from their backyard lowered our blood pressure.

The Seitzes have adopted many children and a number of those were TSC children. Jan served us dinner, and we also had the opportunity to meet briefly with a couple whose hearts long to follow God into any adopting journey He has planned for them. They already have one adopted child from Ukraine, and hope to return soon to bring home three more. We wish we had been able to spend more time together. That has been our feeling after pretty much every visit here in FL.

After dinner, we all scooted over to the Seitzes home church, Victory Church, for one more presentation to a small informal group. It was warm and friendly and a very pleasant way to end this portion of the trip. TSC parents Morgan and Patty Roe drove into Lakeland, and it was such a blessing to meet them and hear how their new sons are adapting to their new family. We’re still so frustrated that we forgot to get pictures with them.

We also had the privilege to meet the Altman family that night. They are not a TSC family but adopted Jaelynn, a darling little eight-year old girl who lived at Maria’s Big House of Hope with Roslyn and Jaden in China. In fact we met our children at the same time, and once we learned this, we are able to go back and pick each other out in the pictures at the Civil Affairs office that day. Jaelynn remembered our babies well, and was so happy to see them, and although Roslyn and Jaden didn’t seem to remember her, they (and Lilyan) had a blast playing with her. More pictures:

My dear friend Jan, adoptive mom to many (some of whom are TSC kids) introducing us

Scott talking while I look on adoringly. 🙂

My portion of the talk again

Q&A session at the end. I wasn’t as bored as I look. Jaden was. 🙂

Our photographer for the evening just happened to notice Lilyan and Jaden while they were listening to us talk. I’m so glad she snapped this picture.

Roslyn and Jaden reunited with their housemate, Jaelynn — and Lilyan totally into the action with them.

Big open space at Victory where the kids had a great time wheeling around with Jaelynn

Today we were able to meet with Jaelynn and her parents, David and Teresa, and her two older sisters for a quick lunch before they headed back home. They also drove quite a distance to be here and meet with us. We were so very blessed by our time with them. One more picture:

One last meeting with Jaelynn before they headed home.

This has been an amazing few days, and we are so thankful that God worked out the details so that we could come, and so thankful to the churches and individuals who donated money and time to make it such a comfortable, fun, beautiful trip for us.

Now we will be shifting gears just a bit. Scott and I are getting kids up from naps and getting them ready to go to a dinner where we will meet, for the first time, families members of others who lost loved ones in the shipwreck that took my brother’s life. We will also be meeting a number of survivors from that horrible night.

Tomorrow morning, we will get up very early and drive about an  hour and a half to attend the 35th Memorial Service of that night. We will try to post more after that.

Here’s a little synopsis of our first day in Tampa:

What an incredible day — and our time here hasn’t even really started.

After our very kind neighbor Larry got up early and dropped the five us at the airport, we began trying to figure out how to get three wheelchairs, a car seat, six checked bags, and five carry-on bags to the check-in counter where we could unload most of it. Delta employees pretty quickly spotted us, and jumped in to help, whisking us over to a much closer counter and beginning a conversation with our kids.

Once we were checked in, they told us – with tears in their eyes – that they wouldn’t allow us to pay for our six checked bags that “it had been taken care of.” We were too surprised to do more than try to choke out words of sincere thanks for this.

They continued helping us get through security and even helped us carry the kids onto the plane once their wheelchairs were gate-checked at the end of the ped-way. The flight was quick, and the kids did great. Roslyn was my seat-mate and happily chatted about how she wished we had been able to bring Murray with us but how he would potty on the airplane floor and doesn’t fit in our laps so well anymore; how her sister, Kristie had told her to ask for gum when it was time for the plane to go “down, down, down to the ground”; and how “evewybody, evewybody” wasn’t able to come with us this time. Oh, my! That girl can talk!

Thankfully, we’ve actually trained our kids to go to sleep on command when we travel (yeah — it’s a great trick!), so when, after a snack I told the three of them it was time for a little nap, they were all completely out within ten minutes.

Our original flight was changed to an earlier flight that got us to Tampa sooner than we expected, so we started our time here a little ahead of schedule. Because most of our children have never seen the ocean or a beach, and because we suddenly realized that our schedule for this trip is so packed that we didn’t think we would have time for that, and because we were running ahead of schedule today, we decided to take the kids to see a beach before going to our hotel — to at least push them out onto the sand in their wheelchairs so they could hear the sound of the surf and see and hear the waves up close.

Well . . . . WHERE do they hide the beaches in Tampa??? After following Siri’s directions in Maps for several hours, we finally had to give up and drive over an hour back in the direction of our hotel so we could get checked in and unpack to prepare for our first presentation tomorrow morning. Maybe there will still be an opportunity along the way over the next few days. There must be a beach here somewhere. I mean the United States stops here, and the ocean begins. Right?

When we arrived at our hotel, we were once again absolutely blown away by God’s blessings and the generosity of His people. Our small suite had been upgraded to a large two-bedroom suite with a family room, two bathrooms, and a full kitchen. We couldn’t believe our eyes when we were shown to our room. It honestly took our breath away. Then we discovered a bag of snacks, fresh fruit, and a gift card for a local supermarket; and another bag with gifts for the kids — all from the families we will be connecting with here. We already feel like blessings have been showered over us, and we just arrived.

Now, we are headed to bed so we can start early in the morning (and hope that Siri does her job a little better as we try to find the church where we’ll be speaking). 😊

I’m attaching a little photo journey of our first day. Enjoy, and thank you so much for all of your prayers.

Checking in. This Delta employee’s name is Joy, and she was a life saver for us!

Joy graciously allowed us to take a picture of her with the kids before we hugged goodbye

Riding the train to our terminal at CVG

Roslyn – on the plane and super excited!

Jaden and Lilyan were seat mates

Time for a snack from the flight attendant

Ha ha! This is what Jaden always does in a genuine attempt to obey us when we tell him it’s time to go to sleep. And, actually, it almost always works for him, becoming a genuine peaceful sleep within a few minutes.

The real deal now . . .

. . . and for Roslyn, too.

As soon as we arrived in Tampa, I catheterized both girls, and then they got busy with their new Magna Doodles while Scott was cathing Jaden . . .

. . . and then Jaden joined them while we all waited for Scott to fetch our rental van

Our rental van is much like our van at home except that it is newer; and cleaner; and has an awesome extra step that makes it much easier for short people to climb in; and the passenger doors actually open from the outside (ours have been broken for years). We would love to trade.

Hello Tampa!

Fed, bathed, and tucked into our amazing hotel suite.

Nite-nite.

We have spent the last few days packing and running errands, and . . .  oh yeah, there were those seven brace/PT appointments yesterday where the kids were casted or fitted for new braces, had repairs done on their existing braces, and did some major workouts with their therapists . . .

. . . and that appointment with Meghan’s hand surgeon where we learned that she has to have surgery on both of her hands. 😖 We will do her right hand in March (24th) once we have Nathan and Erin completely back on their feet. She will be in a cast for about four weeks and then have some therapy for a few weeks. We’ll take a break for the summer and then do her left hand at the end of August or early September.

Oh, and that follow-up with Jaden’s spine surgeon and the news that Jaden has to have another surgery on the other rod in his back. (Ick.) His doctor wanted to do it fairly soon but was fine waiting until early fall so it won’t interrupt any swimming that Jaden might be able to do this summer. Whew!

So . . . with those items all taken care of or properly postponed, we are now free to catch that plane to Tampa tomorrow morning.

We had actually really hoped to be in bed by about 8:30 tonight so we would be fully rested as the five of us embark on this adventure. Unfortunately, we aren’t quite finished yet.

Several of the kids popped their heads into our bedroom throughout the day while I was busy packing (with the help of our new puppy, Murray) and Scott was running to Target (AGAIN!) for that one more thing I forgot to pick up ahead of time. (I know I used to be able to plan ahead. I actually used to be really, really good at it. Not sure what’s happened.)

Each time they looked in on us, they exclaimed, “Wow. that’s a lot of stuff! It looks like you’re going to China.”

They’re right. It kinda does. So many supplies to take when all three have to be catheterized every three hours, and quite a bit of medication, too. A few times today, we caught ourselves wondering what in the world we were thinking when we came up with this great idea.

Murray helping with the packing

Robyn is our most organized, planner-personality child, and she is crucial to any kind of an undertaking like this. She and Meghan helped me get all of the kids’ outfits — including matching hair accessories for the girls — divided into large Ziplock bags that have been labeled with initials and which day they are to be worn. I do love organization.

In spite of the job the packing has been, we are so excited to take this trip. We just hope to get a little sleep tonight first.

We’ll post again from Tampa and try to keep everyone updated on how things go there. Thank you all who responded to Iris and committed to bringing meals to our family here. And thank you all for your prayers for us as we travel, as well as for all of the Rosenows and Godwins staying behind here to keep things going.

More soon!

January has been an emotional month for us for most of our married life. Thirty-five years ago on this day, my brother was about to die and pass into the eternal presence of his Heavenly Father, and we had no idea. (Looking at God in an Odious Shape).

My brother, Gary; me; our little sister, Rachel – about 1977

Thirty-four years ago on this day, I was in labor for the first time, and we didn’t have a clue that we would eventually be parents to twenty-one children.

Our first baby — it all started here

Eleven years ago today, our first adopted child, Meghan, experienced her second adoption when she surrendered her heart and life to God. That was an incredible day! And it still brings tears to my eyes even now.

Meghan, singing with Colin and Stephen at an Orphan Awareness presentation last year

And this January, Scott and I, along with our three youngest children will be taking an emotional trip to Tampa, FL.

We’ve never been to Tampa, but for thirty-five years, we’ve wanted to go. Tampa Bay is where my brother was killed in 1980 when the Coast Guard cutter he was serving on – the Blackthorn – collided with an oil tanker and sank. About half of the men managed to get safely off the ship, and the other half perished. Every year since then, they have held a memorial service at the site, but we’ve never been able to attend. They also have a monument there with the names of the men who died that night engraved for the world to see and remember. I want to see that monument. I’ve wanted to since it was first placed in Blackthorn Memorial Park.

We also have several TSC families in Tampa, and they have invited us over the years to come and speak to families there about adoption. When donations came in a few months ago, sufficient to cover the cost of this trip, our Board of Trustees decided that this was finally the year that we should take this trip. We can’t take the whole family, but even just our three little ones are pretty powerful testimonies of how adoption changes lives. So the five of us will be going to Tampa to share their stories and speak of God’s faithfulness.

We were blessed to be able to time this trip so that we will be there for the Blackthorn’s 35th Memorial Service on January 28. We will finally be able to see where my brother’s life here ended and see his name on the monument that was erected in memory of the men who died. We will be able to meet other families who lost loved ones, and talk with some of the men who did survive — including the ones who have told us that they are Christians now because of my brother’s proclamation that he was a new creation in Christ and because of the way He lived like a newly created man as he walked on this earth.

It’s always an emotional thing for us to meet any other adoptive families — families whose hearts are quickened by the same things that cause our own hearts to burn passionately. And it’s especially emotional to spend time with families who have adopted children who came home as a result of The Shepherd’s Crook’s attempts to reduce the number of orphans in the world by even one more. We have very clear memories of some of these children’s first pictures when they were listed on our website years ago, and to see them growing up, leaving their marks on the world, blessing their families . . . . there really are no words. So we know that spending time with these families in Tampa who have been through very tough things, but have stood strong in their fights for their children, and to watch these children (who aren’t so little anymore) in action in their new lives and think of all that God has done – these things will bring many emotions from deep in our hearts to the surface.

Being at the place where my brother spent his last days and literally drew his last breath, will also cause many emotions to move from the background to the forefront of our minds and hearts.

We are packing many Kleenexes.

Please pray for us as we take this trip. Pray that we won’t let fear of pain cause us to shy away from feeling all that God would have us feel, learn, see, hear while we are there. Pray that we will be empty vessels, ready to be used by Him to accurately represent who He is and how deep His love runs for His children. Please pray that God will bring people to hear what we have to say and for open ears that will listen as we try to give voices to the voiceless orphans of the world; open hearts that will break and choose to join the fight for the fatherless.

Pray for the practical aspects of the trip. Scott and I will be negotiating three wheelchairs through airports, and the three children going with us all have to be catheterized every three hours and need to be kept on their regular medication schedules. Also, our days will be pretty packed the whole time we are there. But we don’t want to let any of these stresses cast a shadow over what we believe could be a beautifully blessed time.

Please pray for our children who will be staying here. We will leave on January 24 and return on January 29. Greg and Kristen will move in with their seven children to care for our other children while we are gone. Erin, whose leg hadn’t healed enough for a walking cast as we had hoped, is still completely off of her feet and requiring much daily care; and Nathan will have surgery on his leg about a week before we leave. He has a piece of bone that’s causing problems for him whenever he wears his prosthesis, so this surgery has to be done asap, but this means that he will only be able to help out on a limited basis while we’re gone.

Our dear friend, Iris, will be coordinating meals for the family here, and if you would like to help out with that, please email her.

If any of you lives in the Tampa area, we’d love, love to see you. Our speaking line-up is as follows:

Sunday morning 1/25: 11:00 a.m. service at Grace Church; 7060 Berry Road; Zephyrhills. Fl; 33540
Sunday evening 1/25: 6:30 service at Crestview Baptist Church; 615 Old Polk City Road; Lakeland, Fl 33809
Monday evening 1/26: 7:00 at Victory Church; 1401 Griffin Rd.; Lakeland, FL; 33810

As always, thank you for your love for our family and your love for the work of The Shepherd’s Crook. We love to hear from you, so please feel free to write to us anytime, comment here, and/or share this post.

Happy New Year!
The Rosenows

Saxon and Murray trying to comfort some of the sick family members

Hopefully, you have all had a great Christmas holiday. Our Christmas was very blessed, but 2015 roared in with tough challenges. I woke up New Year’s Day with a terrible virus that we are thinking might actually be genuine flu, and over the next 24-48 hours, most of our family followed. At the moment, fifteen Rosenows are sick, and only five are still going strong. Scott is the only adult still standing, so he’s been trying to care for everyone. This has been even harder because Erin is still completely dependent on help for everything.

We’ve been so blessed by friends who have tried to help without being exposed to this plague. A neighbor has run errands for us to keep us stocked with necessary foodstuffs and medicines, someone left homemade soup on our doorstep, and our dear friends Mick and Betty continue doing laundry for us at least once a week. I don’t know how we could be getting through each day without all of the help God has sent to us through these angels.

We have a number of appointments this week that we will have to rescheduled, and that’s a disappointment. We don’t like to move appointments out to other weeks because those weeks will have their own appointments. 😖 But . . .  one step at a time.

Happy New Year, and more later when we come out on the other side of this.

Kathy  – for all of us.